Late Diagnosed ADHD: What I’ve Lost & Found
Photo by Leighann Blackwood on Unsplash
I’m reflecting...
ADHD comes with a lot of loss. I often think the longer we live without knowing, the deeper these losses feel. Maybe it’s all the time lost where we could have been living at our potential, but it feels like it’s been ripped away from us without us even knowing we were entitled to it. It can become quite easy to stay stuck in that feeling of loss as it turns to anger, but finally the time comes where we can look at what is possible now before more time just disappears. We can’t change what could have, should have or would have been. But we can make choices and changes now. We have more power now simply in knowing than we ever did before, and it’s up to us to decide how we want to use it.
Maybe that’s the greatest thing I found in this process is my power. It’s the power to speak up, to learn, to forgive myself, to grow, to heal and to be. It’s the power to decide that I’m enough and worth a life that works for me on my terms. It’s the power to uncover and find all that I thought I had lost, was stolen from me or that I never thought I’d ever deserve to feel about myself or discover in the first place. It’s the power to change not only my own reality but those closest to me and others like me in the world. I never knew that kind of power existed in me. In all of us.
I’m still looking though, actively using my voice, my knowledge and talents for more change. I’m still looking to grow, learn, heal and become the person I know I was meant to be. I’m still looking for other ways to support our ADHD and neurodivergent community, particularly marginalised groups. There’s still so much change needed and so much work to be done, despite how far we’ve come. I’m dertermined to do what I can to make a difference.
I’ve lost a lot, even more than I’ve listed here, but what I’ve found and continue to keep finding in my life has made these discoveries all the more special, important and all the more precious.
I’ve defintely gained in such a short time, more than I’ve ever lost.