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I absolutely am interested in this topic and whatever direction you continue with it. I feel that many autistic people I know fall into one of two categories in regard to addictive substances: 1. Making a conscious decision to avoid them, or 2. Falling all the way into them.

(I spent many years in category 2, and I'm now in category one.)

I feel like this connection is not talked about enough. Part of that seems to be, at least to me, because some people in the conversations about addiction are looking at it from a very specific angle of what they mean by addiction. There is a whole thing with this in 12-step programs, which I will not try to go into.

For me, falling all the way into substance use was something that definitely came from looking for a way to mute the degree to which I felt the world. It also (again, for me) had more to do with getting stuck in the routine of it than it did about the substance itself. The substance itself was part of the routine, but my difficulty breaking out of the situation had more to do with my difficulty *breaking out of a set routine* than *learning to live without the effects of the substance.*

In some ways, I'm not sure you can separate the two. But I make the distinction because a lot of people talk about addiction as an issue that you either have or you don't, and it's all or nothing based on your predisposition. I don't see any real usefulness in delineating that to the point that people do. The truth is, if you are using substance to a certain degree and it is affecting your life to a certain degree, I don't think it matters all that much whether it is a physical substance response that puts you there and keeps you there, or whether it is your dependence on routine that puts you there and keeps you there. Either way, at that point, it is an addiction issue.

But yes - always glad to see people write on this topic. For me, using alcohol was a way to "fix" (or cope with) a whole bunch of issues I didn't know what to do about. Social interaction and communication felt easier. Physical/sensory input felt numbed or lessened. That is how it started, and that is why I stayed in that space.

In the years since I quit drinking, I have learned a lot of coping strategies for those same things, but which do not involve substances. I wish I had had a better understanding of such things when I was younger.

So glad you are addressing this important topic. 🌈

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author

Thank you for this! Oh so much to touch on here I could write a series on these points cuz they hit so many thoughts for me too.

I really like the distinction you make between making the conscious decision to stay away from addictive substances or falling all the way into them. I too was a category 2 until I had to become a category 1. The idea of perhaps it being a lot about routine usage never occurred to me before but that was definitely my case in the struggle of quitting alcohol. I never connected the ways that I used alcohol to cope until I stopped using it and had avoided people all together for years. I’m only now understanding other coping mechanisms that help manage my social anxiety. If I hadn’t broken the routine usage, I’d probably still be drinking today.

The idea of substance vs process addictions comes up for me too. My alcoholism kept me as stuck in life as much as when I have an OCD flare up. I engage in compulsive behaviour with both. We don’t talk a lot about how addiction is rooted in disconnection and compulsion either, both of which ND folks engage in very regularly in order to manage all sorts of stresses on the body and mind. It’s hard work to deal with so it makes sense that if we can find to a solution that we believe will make quick work of what pains us with ease, then it’s tempting to cling to it.

We need to be talking more about the impact of it in our lives and what we’re doing /have done to reconnect to ourselves and others while finding peace amongst the chaos. 💜

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founding

“Now we don’t know what kind of neurodivergence Sherlock is flirting with in this series, but one thing we do know is that he most certainly is not experiencing the world like the norm.” - 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 omfg how I adore adore adore adore the way you phrase things (including silence!!!!! And also words and sentences lol) - and “we don’t know what kind…flirting with…but”- it’s just chefs kiss. Chefs fuckin’ kiss. That literal bit has hoovered up an entire essay or 30, the kind of essay I struggle (to want) to read cos to me the point is what you’ve just said hahahaha & the way you’ve said it gets us where we wanna be in a hop skip and jump rather than half marathon slog AND IM LAUGHING MY WAY THERE 💖💖💖✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨

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